1. You can’t put a timeline on a relationship, and there’s no telling when exclusivity is right for you, but according to a study from Lisa Daily, most couples get into an “exclusive” relationship after 6 to 8 dates.
2. Daily’s study also suggests that men know when they’re falling for
someone as soon as three dates in. Women take longer, reporting the
same feelings around date 14. Interestingly, that’s exactly the same
time that most couples say they exchange keys to each other’s homes:
between the 12th and 14th date.
3. Singledom is inertia. According to a commonly cited statistic from Neil Clark Warren, over half of people who report their
relationship status as “single” say they haven’t been on a date in two
years. There’s potentially a reason for this. When polled, 40% of men
say that they are “scared” when first interacting with a potential mate.
4. Deciding whether you want to be in a relationship with someone is a
protracted, often excruciating process of tests and feats of physical
strength, like Heracles’ labors or a holiday at home with your parents.
However, knowing whether you want to have sex with someone is much
simpler. According to Psychologists at UPenn, most people say they know
within the first three seconds if they would fuck someone or not.
5. They say that most of communication is non-verbal, and “they” are
right. Most women (57%) said that their first impressions of a guy are
based off of his body language and self-presentation. Just 38% judged
him on how he speaks and a low 7% cared about what he actually said. So,
basically, women and men aren’t that different after all.
6. Of course, body type matters in attracting a mate, but being “too
skinny” counts against you much less than being overweight. Although
overweight people are viewed highly unfavorably (even amongst children),
people are more likely to ascribe positive characteristics to skinny
people. According to Victoria Zdrock, they are often seem as
“intelligent,” although “fearful,” as if every thin person were Woody
Allen.
7. Although cultural norms suggest that men should always do the
asking, Match.com polling reports that 91% of men who use the site are
comfortable with a woman asking them out. Suck on that, patriarchy.
8. As far as who pays, Match suggests that increasing amounts of
Americans are eschewing the traditional rule that the man pays for the
first date. Between 2010 and 2012, the number of people who said that
whoever did the asking should do the paying shot up from 21% to 32%, a
50% increase in just two years.
9. During the same time period, women were increasingly initiating
nookie — because, hey, they’re horny, too. In 2010, just over a third of
women said that they would make the first move, but last year, almost
half reported taking that initial baby step.
10. According to AskMen.com,
Italian and Chinese food are a favorites on dates, although Italian may
be best prepared at home. They recommend Sushi for a second or third
date and more adventurous choices like Moroccan or Ethopian for later
dates, when you know if they would be into that sort of thing. (This is
how you know you have a keeper.) Greek is best consumed on a double
date.
11. There’s a particular reason for the no Greek rule or Ethiopian
rule: They aren’t great on the mouth, a huge deal for singles. When
meeting a partner, two of the biggest considerations –
commonly cited across gender lines — are the cleanliness of their teeth
and the freshness of their breath. Next time, dudes, pop an Altoid
before that date. Another big turn off is negativity, so smile when you do it.
12. According to Victoria Zdrock (aka Dr. Z), women said that ten of
their biggest turn-offs were farting/burping, unkempt cuticles, nose
hair, bad taste in eyeglasses, bad hair, acne, “man boobs” and when
their date is missing a tooth. However, Betty White is missing a lot of
teeth and seems to be doing fine, so I guess it’s not transferrable
across age and gender.
13. In more gender fuckery, women are more likely than men to say
that they need independence in a relationship. Women report much higher
needs of personal space, with 93% saying its very important to them,
compared to 81% of men. While 63% of men say that they need their own
finances in a serious relationship, a much higher 77% of women affirm
that they want to keep those bank accounts separate.
14. In statistics
that make me more sad, one study says that a woman will up her
likelihood of divorce by 5% for every $5000 dollars she earns over her
husband’s salary. But if it ended badly, she might win in the end.
Research has shown that divorce is a killer — shortening male life
expectancy by almost 4 years.
15. Should a couple break up, the average breakup time is
between the three and five month period, when things are just starting
to get serious. Most breakups are announced on a Monday, because what
could be worse than going back to work, amirite?
16. If you date online, you can often expect to break up online. According to the Match singles, 48% of their breakups took place over email. Luckily, though, only 5% of total breakups occurred over text message.
17. Although you can meet someone just about anywhere, workplace
relationships have a strangely high success rate — if your goal is to
put a ring on it. Around 40% of romances that start at the water cooler
result in marriage. So make sure to wear that freakum dress to your next
office party ladies. Beyonce is watching.
18. If you live in New York or Washington and are looking for love,
you may be in luck. According to 2009 Census stats, those two states
have the highest percentages of
singles — with Washington reporting a whopping 70%. But Idaho has the
highest rate of married folks at 60%. Utah is close behind at 59%.
Insert your jokes here.
19. Also, you know how those girls on Sex and the City always
complained about how there were so many single women but so few single
men? That might be true, as the Census suggests. Nationally there are 86
eligible males for every 100 women. However, there are 100 million
single people in the US, so one of them has to work out — at least I
hope.
20. Side fact that I have no proof to back up: For the gays in the
audience, there are 100 bottoms for every top. This isn’t true, even
though it could be, but goddamn it feels that way sometimes.
21. A survey in Glamour Magazine found
that most women don’t want to buy sex toys online. 66% preferred to do
it in person, like shopping for a new dress or a clutch. 61% of those
women said the reason was that they found the experience of buying it to
be a turn-in in and of itself. The part where your vibrator thrusts
inside you all night is just an added, wonderful bonus.
22. As far as sexual fantasies go, ABC reports that
the most common is having sex outside — with a whopping 57% of the
population saying they’re into that. Only 14% of folks have had a
threesome, but 21% of them have thought about it. (IMO, that means 86%
of people need to have threesomes.) Less than a fifth of people have
cheated on their partner, but much more of them have fantasized about
doing so: Almost a third. Just over half of Americans say that they
discuss these fantasies with their partners.
23. 48% of women say that they have faked an orgasm. 52% of women are liars. 25% of women will never achieve orgasm through
sexual intercourse alone. The other 75% better have partners who will
go down on them — or 100% of those men should be single.
24. In weird facts that seem apropros of nothing, a majority of women
report being attracted to men who dress in blue on the first date. Too
bad about that Blue Power Ranger then. All the good ones are gay —
right, ladies? Except for Bradley Cooper. I hold out hope
.
25. Men often say that they like the natural look on a woman, but they’re dirty fucking liars. A memorable segment on Girl Code
argued that “natural” for most men is Kim Kardashian, because they
don’t think she’s wearing any makeup. And research shows that a) Kim
Kardashian is wearing a ton of fucking makeup and b) men like that
anyway. TLC and Chemistry.com found that a woman in a bar will be approached an average of six minutes more quickly if she’s painted up.
26. According to the same set of statistics, men like their women to
be “60 pounds lighter” than they are. Maybe it’s a good thing I don’t
usually date women — because by that measure, I would be dating
skeletons and children.
27. Although we think that queer people are more into “hookup
culture” than their het counterparts (“the gay lifestyle,” or whatever
that means), that’s actually not true at all.
Queer folks (all those on the LGBTQ spectrum) are more likely to report
that “romance” is most important to them in a relationship. The rates
are 38% for gay men, 36% for lesbians and 32% for overall single people.
28. Be careful what you’re sharing over the technology. According to Match.com,
48% of women and 38% of men say that they research someone online
before they go out with them, and similar numbers state that they would
flake on a date because they found something they didn’t like. If you’re
sexting with your date, like a majority of the population do, know that
almost a quarter of people say that they show them to other people. So
be mindful when sharing nudes.
29. Lastly, we’re told that being in a relationship and being single are completely different, but those ol’ Match.com statistics
show that’s not the case. Single people go out just as often as
partnered folks do. When asked if they’re out 1-3 times each week, 52%
of singles said yes, and the figure for relationshippers was nearly
identical (46%). So, single people, don’t let anyone tell you that the
grass is greener on the other side. That grass still gets shitfaced and
makes stupid decisions at the bar, just like you do. Booze is the great
equalizer.
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